The Son of Man Came Not To Be Served, But…

Christians are a servant-hearted bunch. At least, we ought to be! And usually we are, to one degree or another. We love our King who humbled himself, took on the form of a servant and died a humiliating death on a cross for us. This event has gripped our hearts, and we want to likewise follow in those footsteps and serve others with our lives; sacrificing ourselves daily, and even sometimes permanently, in giving our lives for those who need Christ. It is a freeing thing, a life-giving thing, to serve our spouses, children, parents, churches, communities etc. This mindset, thankfully, does exist in most believers in the West, and as our nations have been shaped by Christian ideals for centuries, I think it is also evident in our larger societies to a degree.

Contrast this with my current society that has been pretty much untouched by Gospel ideals. People have no problem at all trampling over others to get to the top. No problem using other people. Last week, I began helping with some “Core Values” training for a big business in our capital city. It was set up as a small thing by a missionary a number of years ago, and has grown to be a large, good quality, and well-respected business. In the introductory session several commented on one of the core values – Servant Leadership – how it was hard. They mentioned having seen the CEO cleaning dishes when someone was out sick, or cleaning toilets because he had some spare time. It amazed them as a thing so foreign to society here.

One day one of our teammates’ sons threw a tantrum at a mealtime. The lady who works for us as a cook and cleaner commented on the fact, saying, “Good, he will be a great leader one day. Your older son is too peaceful; I worry about him. Could he ever be like this?” In this world, the strong-man wins. Serving others is out of the question unless you are doomed to it by your position in society.

So, praise the Lord for those hearts he changes, for humble, servant hearts that long to esteem others greater than themselves. This is a new birth miracle.

However, this blog is not about that.

Another element of society here is that, due to a ridiculously high population, there are so many people employed for proportionately little work. In a hotel that isn’t too busy, staff will stand around for a long time, waiting for the next person to arrive and break the monotony. This, coupled with a deep sense of honouring others of higher standing (especially those of white skin), means that we often have no end of people serving us.

Checking in? You don’t have the option of carrying our bags to your hotel room yourselves. They are quickly grabbed from us.

Bought something heavy? Our employee who is half your size and a quarter of your weight will carry it on his shoulders to your house.

Browsing in the shop? Let me grab all the possible shirts that you would like, that are in your size.

At every turn, we are served by those who esteem us as higher than themselves.

Now, we prickle at this. And it is very tempting to start justifying our response by Scripture. We have come to this country to serve it. We are following Jesus. The Son of man did not come to be served, but to serve! We think that being served is stripping us of our ability to serve, as if it’s a one-way thing. And the more I think about it, the more I am convinced that my prickly response is not a pure motive of servant-heartedness, but is largely influenced by my Western-formed mindset of individualism.

If I check my heart, I find that I am not wanting to refuse service on the basis of my serving others, but because I subconsciously feel “I can do it myself”. I don’t need someone to take my bags. I’m stronger than the delivery man. I am perfectly capable at navigating this mega-city (this one is definitely a lie I choose to believe for my sanity!). The reality is, that I am too individualistic. Too happy to give out of my grand reserves. But not weak enough to receive service.

The trope that missionaries are colonialists is fairly easily provable as false. But nonetheless, there still resides in the heart of all fallen creatures that dark part that sees ourselves as more sufficient than others. Longing to be those that bless, rather than the receivers of blessing, can have very mixed motives. It’s not that we necessarily come with a White-Saviour complex, but in more subtle ways, we want to give to the exclusion of receiving. After all, isn’t that what the Son of Man did?

Yet was he not also humble enough to receive the tears of a scandalous woman, to receive the hospitality of tax collectors, to receive the costly perfume from a woman who probably owned it as her financial security? Coming to serve didn’t mean he did not receive appropriate service. It meant he wasn’t coming to demand allegiance as a strong-man.

The challenge to my heart is to tread the line between a Western individualistic mindset of self-sufficiency, and a South Asian mindset of demanding respect, and lording position over people. That line is the gospel mindset, of approaching each person with a servant attitude, regardless of position, while also acknowledging my own need of receiving blessing from others.

I don’t think it just exists on the mission field either. Churches across the world always benefit more when people are not just willing to serve but are willing to be open to their own need, to relinquish self-sufficiency, to admit their incompleteness on their own, and to receive blessings from others. We are a body after all. Not only does this humble us, it also blesses us, and it gives others the chance to use their gifts to bless.

Yes, it must be from a servant heart, but, sometimes, being served is the most humble thing we can do.

“For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you— that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith, both yours and mine.”

– Romans 1:11-12